|*Sniff*... If only...|
|Maybe it could be a horror movie.|
|It's like Where's Waldo, only Waldo's looking for you. With a sniper rifle.|
How on earth did he find so many of them in such a short amount of time, you ask? Well, upon discovering that all sorts of their soldiers were being taken out by some crazy farmer in the forest, the Soviets decided to send entire squads of soldiers, including dozens of counter snipers, to take him out. They used artillery strikes. They carpet bombed his general area. And they failed miserably. Simo earned the nickname “The White Death”, as he took out everyone that was sent to kill him. Even the carpet bombing failed, supposedly doing no more than shredding his coat a bit with shrapnel. Oh, and lest I forget, let me mention that he did all of this in 20 to 40 degree below zero weather, in a snowy forest, during a time of year when there was very little daylight.
|The actor would be|
Take a moment to digest the sheer potential of a movie here. I mean, yeah, sure, it probably wouldn’t be up for any awards. But it would easily be the most badass movie of all time. You know all those classic action heroes in The Expendables? Yeah, Simo Häyhä would kill all of them. And they legitimately wouldn’t know what hit them.