Django Unchained. Or rather, The Best Thing Ever.

Tarantino's next romp.

Okay, so maybe not "The Best Thing Ever", but pretty darn near close. The casual movie goer is probably thinking, "Uh. What?" Allow me to explain why Django Unchained will be so awesome.

Quentin Tarantino does Spaghetti-Western.

This guy. I love. So much.

AWESOME!!! AM I RIGHT? If you do not know who Quentin Tarantino is please kindly leave this planet. Well, maybe you haven't hear of him, but I'm sure you've at least heard of some of his cult classics (oxymoron...?) such as Pulp Fiction, Reservoir Dogs, Inglorious Basterds, Death Proof, Jackie Brown, and oh yeah, Kill Bill Vol. 1 and Kill Bill Vol. 2. Now, if you haven't heard of any of those, let alone never seen them, please, do yourself a favor and watch them (or if you do not, please, GET OFF MY PLANET).

I want one...

While I must admit that I am a rather late-bloomer when it comes to Tarantino (I was aware of his work, but never really fully appreciated them until someone introduced me in full my Freshman year of college), it should in no way put a blemish on my incredible man-crush for everything he does. And I mean EVERYTHING. I get that his 1950s-60s grindhouse style doesn't suit many people (hence, he's collected more of a cult following), but you still have to appreciate his artistic flair in both film style and scriptwriting prowess. Seriously. He makes the ridiculous violence in his film look high-brow. Da-what.

Django Unchained should keep up Tarantino's streak of over-the-top violence and gratuitously gratuitous gut-splattering. Plus Tarantino collaborates with the incredibly talented cinematographer, Robert Richardson. While he is probably not a house-hold name, the three-time Academy Award winner for Best Cinematography has been involved in projects with Tarantino that include the Kill Bills and Inglorious Basterds. Richardson has also been a frequent choice for filmmakers Oliver Stone, Errol Morris, and my hero, Martin Scorsese.

So, Tarantino, Richardson, Spaghetti-Western... the whole thing sounds too good to be true. Oh believe it. You better sit down if you can't handle it because we haven't even gotten to the star-studded cast of A-Listers, who are not only known for their ridiculous good-looks, but also have incredible acting chops to boot.

Oh yeah. He's in it.

Um. Christoph?
You have something on your ear...

To reiterate: Quentin Tarantino does Spaghetti-Western. Okay, okay, that's cool and all but let's add some more names to this mix... How 'bout this:

"Quentin Tarantino does Spaghetti-Western that stars Jaime Foxx, Leonardo DiCaprio, Christoph Walz, Kerry Washington, Samuel L. Jackson, Kurt Russell, and Sacha Baron Cohen."
Deep breaths... deeeeeeeep breaths...

Well, that sounds awesome, you're probably thinking (YOU BETTER), but the next logical question is, "What's this film even going to be about? I mean, will it be worth my time?"

Uhhhh. Yes. Yes it will. Allow me to explain.

The film works with some pretty heavy material: slavery. And if you know anything about Tarantino, he's not going to make it easy to sit through... It'll be violent, graphic, and pulpy. While I've been geeking out for the last 200 or so words, I do genuinely admire the fact that Tarantino will tackle such a controversial topic.

Another pic. Of awesomeness.

The synopsis goes a little something like this:

Set in the deep south, freed slave, Django (Foxx), and a German-dentist-turned-bounty-hunter, Dr. King Schulze (Walz) hunt down the cruel yet charming plantation owner, Calvin Candie (DiCaprio), to free Django's wife, Broomhilda (Washington).

Because I wanted a Reservoir Dogs photo.

In short, Django goes out seeking revenge on his former slave owner. While, in true Tarantino fashion, copious amounts of blood and guts are spilled. Obvi. Have I mentioned I'm excited for this?

Django Unchained comes out Christmas day of 2012. In the meantime, I'll try to stay cool like Fonzi... but don't count on it. Now, time to go fangirl over Reservoir Dogs. Again...

Some fun facts about Django Unchained... Will Smith was in talks to play Django, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt's name was also thrown into the mix to play a role in the film. Kevin Costner and Jonah Hill were tied to the project but had both had to turn it down due to scheduling conflicts.